SPECIFICATIONS
Sounds like: A phased guitar tone cluster crushing a bulldozer. With classic pop sensibilities and poetic lyrics.
Release date: When we finish moving all the little scratches around so it skips in the right places.
Genre: Antimatter.
Easy listening: If you are deaf.
Guitars: 2-6, depending on configuration.
Microphones: As many as we can.
Gaffer’s tape: Load bearing structure.
Jackhammers: At the worst possible moment.
Bulldozers: Wherever they want.
Cats: Are always on the wrong side of the door.
Interruptions: Predictable.
Sticky notes: Perhaps current. Perhaps not.
Knobs and buttons: We know what they do so you don’t have to.
Less: Is more.
More: or less.
Narcissism: Required for proper operation.
Sorceress: (1) Cary Grace.
Feedback howls while tripping over things: Allan Coberly (highly skilled).
There are no: Accidents.
Irony: Optional.
Confusion: I’m not sure.
Analogue: Yeah!
Digital: Whatever.
iPod: Crunch. What?
Rickenbacker bass: Of course.
Andy Budge: No oven mitts.
Hits round things: David Payne.
Rust: Makes them sound better.
Oatmeal: Is good for you.
Coffee: Yes.
Breakfast: Life is unfair.
Distractions: Infinite.
Procrastination: No it isn’t. It’s a delay line.
Denial: No it isn’t. It’s a wiring problem.
Obsession: A lifestyle choice.
Market research: Very extensive.
Legal status: Probably somewhere.
For service: Use a sledgehammer.
In case of emergency: Pause-Record-Play.
For technical support: Straitjacket.
Documentation: What? Is that some kind of sick joke?
Dead air: It wasn’t loud enough.
Adapters: Only to XLR.
When in doubt: Stereo phaser.
Pork jowl: Won’t make it through customs.
Save it: For a rainy day.
50 Hz hum: UK.
60 Hz hum: USA.
Hummus: May contain nuts.
Figure it out: You aren’t smart enough.